Dear Man

Dear Man,

I know you don’t give two fucks about me other than what I can do for you, but the fact is: I’m a very sweet girl, and you know NOTHING about why I am single.

You can treat me like a dirty little whore behind closed doors, I might eventually submit to you…but it still remains that I’m a strong beautiful woman that deserves to be treated with respect, no matter what.

Yes. I was a completely heinous bitch this morning. Am I sorry? Perhaps. Am I going to apologize? No…because you don’t really care.

I tried to be nice when I woke you up. I let you sleep as long as I possibly could… Why? Because I’m a heinous bitch.

I came and MET you last night, to bring your drunk ass back to my house, so that you wouldn’t have to sleep alone… Why? Because I’m a heinous bitch.

I let you manhandle me (Yes. I fucking loved it.) knowing that I wasn’t going to get the fucking that I so badly wanted…so badly needed…that you fucking owe me. Why? Because I’m a heinous bitch.

I was a heinous bitch this morning because, for some reason, I will let you treat me like this over and over, knowing that you don’t really care, and that you SURE AS HELL don’t deserve MY submission.

So, mostly…I was mad at me…and I took it out on you…but, again, you don’t really care.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Douchebag

Dear Douchebag,

It’s adorable that YOU are ignoring ME or whatever…after spending 3 nights at my house...sleeping in my bed...eating my food…not getting me off a single time…of course, there WAS that matter of you not getting your dick up two of those nights… and I’m not even sure why you stayed the last night, but I DID notice that you took the bottle of whiskey that I bought… when you left out like your hair was on fire... You left your cane pole...and some ugly bruises that do NOT demonstrate your "dominance"...instead, that you are an asshole. You've definitely earned your merit badge.

Also…I stuck my neck out for you to get you a job with my dad…you probably should just go ahead and forget about that, as he tends to have a bit of a low-slacker tolerance, and very little patience.

To be fair, I'll give credit where due. You have a nice cock. I love your control when you're making me choke on it...making my eyes water and my mascara run down my cheeks. Love that you aren't a pussy like the other guys I've been with.

This is bullshit. And it's not even about any weird complicated feelings or amazing sex....because...let's face it...you are lacking in that department. You talk an excellent game, but you should REALLY work on your delivery.

Anyway, thanks for taking advantage of me and pretty much nothing else. At least you got laid.

Looove,
Kimmie.

P.S.

P.S.

I tend to run away from things  (or people) because it scares me that I like them.

Dear Man

Dear Man,

Congratulations. You're in my fucking head.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Man

Dear Man,

Fuck you for pulling that shit and making this morning about you.

[Less] Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Man

Dear Cute UPS Man,

I have a yummy cupcake with your name on it. Wink wink.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Skin

Dear Skin,

I'm not impressed with you acting like you're 13 again. This is not very grown up behavior. Straighten up!

Looove [anyway],
Kimmie.

Dear Libido

Dear Libido,

You really need to chill out. Not EVERYTHING is sexual... You're out of control!

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Friend

Dear Old Friend,

This is going to be so much fun. I can't wait to see you.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Man

Dear Man,

I pretty much want you...

...but then...I'm betting you know that...

Tease...

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Readers

Dear Readers,

I know I'm not around that much anymore, but I'm still here, I promise! Please don't be shy... leave me comments. I love comments. :)

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Girl

Dear Girl,

You're trying too fucking hard. You look desperate.

Even worse, he thinks its fun....but it's going no where.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Deer Man

Dear Man,

I play it off coolly, I think....but trust me, in my head, I'm on my knees. ;)

It's so hot.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Man

Dear Man,

I'd like to give you....the presidential treatment...

;)

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Guy

Dear Guy,

It's ridiculous how much I miss you. I want to see that crazy mop of hair, and hear your voice. I met someone the other day, and his personality reminds me so much of you, it's crazy.

I hope you're well...

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Girl

Dear Girl,

It's petty and childish that it bothers me so much, but it's a sense of betrayal. Also, the fact that you haven't mentioned it speaks volumes. Man up.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Man

Dear Man,

It makes me so sad to see you so....oblivious...and I miss you, dreadfully. I got pretty down when I saw you pass by today... I hate that.

Please remember me.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Guy

Dear Guy,

Are you...flirting... with me?

I kinda like it...

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Guys

Dear Guys,

Just because I HAVE a vagina doesn't mean you have to use it.

Looove,
Kimmie.

Dear Man

Dear Man,

I'm worth the effort.

You should have figured that out by now.

You might...too late.

Looove,
Kimmie.