I can't wait to see you next weekend!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
6.29.2011
Dear Boy
Dear Boy,
I have a confession...but I can't confess it here. Just know that it's a good confession... one that would probably make your head swell.
Looove,
Kimmie.
I have a confession...but I can't confess it here. Just know that it's a good confession... one that would probably make your head swell.
Looove,
Kimmie.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
P.S.
P.S.
Sometimes, I don't even realize I'm thinking about you until I laugh out loud when I remember something you'be said or done.
Sometimes, I don't even realize I'm thinking about you until I laugh out loud when I remember something you'be said or done.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
Dear Sir
Dear Sir,
You smell bad; your girlfriend looks like a 2 cent whore; and your attitude sucks balls.
Looove,
Kimmie.
You smell bad; your girlfriend looks like a 2 cent whore; and your attitude sucks balls.
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.27.2011
Dear Girl
Dear Girl,
You look fabulous! I'm so proud of you!
Looove,
Kimmie.
You look fabulous! I'm so proud of you!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
Dear Man
Dear Man,
We need to exercise more often. I can barely move this morning. Fun & healthy...how much better can it get?
Think about it.
Looove,
Kimmie.
We need to exercise more often. I can barely move this morning. Fun & healthy...how much better can it get?
Think about it.
Looove,
Kimmie.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
6.26.2011
6.25.2011
Dear Boy
Dear Boy,
I beat you! I beat you! Heh Heh Heh!
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. You don't really have to pay me. Unless you want to. You know you kinda do. *giggle*
P.P.S. You're fun. I like playing Wii with you...even if sometimes, I think you let me win. But it's still fun.
In other, unrelated news: The dude on TV right now looks very much like a lady. Dude looks like a laaaady!
[Again]Looove,
Kimmie.
I beat you! I beat you! Heh Heh Heh!
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. You don't really have to pay me. Unless you want to. You know you kinda do. *giggle*
P.P.S. You're fun. I like playing Wii with you...even if sometimes, I think you let me win. But it's still fun.
In other, unrelated news: The dude on TV right now looks very much like a lady. Dude looks like a laaaady!
[Again]Looove,
Kimmie.
6.24.2011
Dear Daddy
Dear Bank Daddy,
You are the shiznit! Milkshakes on Friday afternoon make me happy. (Well...that...and my lunch break. Heh!) You are better than Betty Crocker. You are Buddy Crocker. :)
Looove,
Kimmie. [and the rest of the ladies!]
You are the shiznit! Milkshakes on Friday afternoon make me happy. (Well...that...and my lunch break. Heh!) You are better than Betty Crocker. You are Buddy Crocker. :)
Looove,
Kimmie. [and the rest of the ladies!]
Dear Woman
Dear Woman,
Why are you so fucking annoying?
Is it because you click your pen non-stop until I'd like to take it away from you and stab myself in the temple?
Is it because you feel the need to tell the same story over and over to everyone you see...instead of gathering everyone around to tell it once?
Maybe it's because you never seem to shut up...at all?
It could always be the way you may tell a story, then a couple of hours later walk up to someone and carry on like you had never stopped telling the story.. "...yeah...I was like, blahblahImdumbblahblahandsoannoyingblahblah..."
Any of these are possible. Quite likely, even.
I like it when you aren't at work...so I get a moment of peace & quiet.
Have fun on your day off next week!!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Why are you so fucking annoying?
Is it because you click your pen non-stop until I'd like to take it away from you and stab myself in the temple?
Is it because you feel the need to tell the same story over and over to everyone you see...instead of gathering everyone around to tell it once?
Maybe it's because you never seem to shut up...at all?
It could always be the way you may tell a story, then a couple of hours later walk up to someone and carry on like you had never stopped telling the story.. "...yeah...I was like, blahblahImdumbblahblahandsoannoyingblahblah..."
Any of these are possible. Quite likely, even.
I like it when you aren't at work...so I get a moment of peace & quiet.
Have fun on your day off next week!!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Cupcakes
Dear Cupcakes,
You are delicious.
I miss you terribly much.
You know it was fun.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. Woohoo!! Haikus are fun!
You are delicious.
I miss you terribly much.
You know it was fun.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. Woohoo!! Haikus are fun!
Dear Kimmie
Dear Kimmie,
I am so proud of you. This whole week you've managed to fix your hair and put on makeup and make an attempt to look nice. You are gorgeous.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. I love your new hair!
I am so proud of you. This whole week you've managed to fix your hair and put on makeup and make an attempt to look nice. You are gorgeous.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. I love your new hair!
Dear Man
Dear Man,
You should come see me this weekend...or next weekend. *waggles eyebrows* I'm in the mood to make cupcakes. :)
Looove,
Kimmie.
You should come see me this weekend...or next weekend. *waggles eyebrows* I'm in the mood to make cupcakes. :)
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Morons
Dear Morons,
It's sad that you just laugh when I tell you the truth...and it's not even something I would even want to lie about. Tsk tsk..
You oughtn't be so...naive.
Looove,
Kimmie.
It's sad that you just laugh when I tell you the truth...and it's not even something I would even want to lie about. Tsk tsk..
You oughtn't be so...naive.
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Woman
Dear Woman,
It has become very apparent to me that, today, you are going to annoy the piss out of me. Let's just try to make it until 5pm without me snapping your head off.
In other words, Shut it.
Looove,
Kimmie.
It has become very apparent to me that, today, you are going to annoy the piss out of me. Let's just try to make it until 5pm without me snapping your head off.
In other words, Shut it.
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.23.2011
Dear Girl
Dear Girl,
You are boring. That is all.
Looove,
Kimmie.
You are boring. That is all.
Looove,
Kimmie.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
6.21.2011
Dear M&Ms
Dear Peanut Butter M&Ms,
You are delicious.
I love your yummy goodness.
Banana hammock.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. That was a little haiku...just for you...even though it doesn't make sense. *giggle*
You are delicious.
I love your yummy goodness.
Banana hammock.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. That was a little haiku...just for you...even though it doesn't make sense. *giggle*
6.20.2011
Dear Kimmie
Dear Kimmie,
Tsk tsk tsk...
You know better. You're going to get fired...or go to the hot place (which is still likely to get you fired...).
But it's funneh!!! *giggle*
Looove,
Kimmie.
Tsk tsk tsk...
You know better. You're going to get fired...or go to the hot place (which is still likely to get you fired...).
But it's funneh!!! *giggle*
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.19.2011
6.17.2011
6.15.2011
Dear Man
Dear Man,
I'm writing a story. It's about you. And me. And it's fucking hot. ;)
Looove,
Kimmie.
I'm writing a story. It's about you. And me. And it's fucking hot. ;)
Looove,
Kimmie.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
6.13.2011
Dear Cat
Dear Cat-Who-Thought-It-Was-Fucking-Cute-To-Piss-In-My-Car,
Fuck. You.
[No fucking]Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. I hope you die.
Fuck. You.
[No fucking]Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. I hope you die.
Dear Shoos
Dear New Shoos,
You are faboooluss and I love you... Please watch your step...you are already getting scuffed up. If you weren't on the feet of a clutz, you might stand a better chance...but just be careful. K?
Looove,
Kimmie.
You are faboooluss and I love you... Please watch your step...you are already getting scuffed up. If you weren't on the feet of a clutz, you might stand a better chance...but just be careful. K?
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.12.2011
Dear Girl
Dear Girl,
I feel like you don't like me for some reason. I'm not sure the stories you've heard... It's really okay, though. I don't like you either.
...but I keep thinking about the day I saw your boyfriend and we went up to the top of the parking garage and looked over the city, taking pictures... then we went down a couple of levels to escape the sun and made out like we were in high school.
Of course...he wasn't your boyfriend then.
He made my toes curl and my...well...
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. The sad part is, we'd probably get along swimmingly...if we ever met.
I feel like you don't like me for some reason. I'm not sure the stories you've heard... It's really okay, though. I don't like you either.
...but I keep thinking about the day I saw your boyfriend and we went up to the top of the parking garage and looked over the city, taking pictures... then we went down a couple of levels to escape the sun and made out like we were in high school.
Of course...he wasn't your boyfriend then.
He made my toes curl and my...well...
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. The sad part is, we'd probably get along swimmingly...if we ever met.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
6.10.2011
Dear Tub
Dear Big Girl Bath Tub,
I can hear you, in the distance, calling my name. I'm coming for you soon! I can't wait to get in you and soak and relax...and shave my legs like a good little girlscout.
*sigh*
I can't wait! See you soon!
Looove,
Kimmie.
I can hear you, in the distance, calling my name. I'm coming for you soon! I can't wait to get in you and soak and relax...and shave my legs like a good little girlscout.
*sigh*
I can't wait! See you soon!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Sir?
Dear Sir(Ma'am?),
Where on earth are you headed? Or mayhaps, where have you been?
You come into the bank wearing a hat that looks suspiciously like a "China man's hat", carrying a vaccuum cleaner & a water cooler... and expect no one to ask questions?
It's nearly noon on a Friday... I'm baffled.
Oooh...to be a fly on the wall of your gay little life.
Stay real, gurl!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Where on earth are you headed? Or mayhaps, where have you been?
You come into the bank wearing a hat that looks suspiciously like a "China man's hat", carrying a vaccuum cleaner & a water cooler... and expect no one to ask questions?
It's nearly noon on a Friday... I'm baffled.
Oooh...to be a fly on the wall of your gay little life.
Stay real, gurl!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear People
Dear People,
It really makes things go a lot smoother if you turn all your currency with the faces going the same way. I don't know why it does...but it does... and it only take a second. Do it.
Please? (I'm really being terribly nice today with all the "please"-es and what not...)
Looove,
Kimmie.
It really makes things go a lot smoother if you turn all your currency with the faces going the same way. I don't know why it does...but it does... and it only take a second. Do it.
Please? (I'm really being terribly nice today with all the "please"-es and what not...)
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Phone
Dear Fucking Phone,
Please stop ringing off the fucking hook you stupid piece of shit!
I said "please".
Looove,
Kimmie.
Please stop ringing off the fucking hook you stupid piece of shit!
I said "please".
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.09.2011
Dear FedEx
Dear FedEx,
Wtf?! Why can't you ever show up at a decent hour? It's almost time for me to get off work, and you still haven't delivered my package! Ughhh!!!
[Zero]Looove,
Kimmie.
Wtf?! Why can't you ever show up at a decent hour? It's almost time for me to get off work, and you still haven't delivered my package! Ughhh!!!
[Zero]Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Thursday
Dear Thursday,
I'm sorry that I've thought (and wished) that you were Friday all day, but you kinda sucked...I need a weekend.
Looove,
Kimmie.
I'm sorry that I've thought (and wished) that you were Friday all day, but you kinda sucked...I need a weekend.
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.08.2011
6.07.2011
Dear Kimmie
Dear Kimmie,
Please learn to wait until after you have finished writing a story to go back and edit it. At this rate...you'll never get through!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Please learn to wait until after you have finished writing a story to go back and edit it. At this rate...you'll never get through!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Sister
Dear Sister,
I know there was a time when we didn't get along, at all. (Umm...hello? Who remembers you calling me a bitch on my wedding day? Meeeee!!! =P)
During the past year, we have gotten so close (sometimes too close, haha!), and I'm so glad. I used to wonder what it would be like if Sadie had lived, and I'd have had an older sister...now I feel like I know. It's nice to have someone that I can connect with and talk to.
You have become one of my very best friends (and I never really thought I'd see the day I would say that.) and I love you.
I'm so glad you're my sister.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. Sometimes, you get on my nerves, still...and I'm sure I get on yours, but that's what sisters are s'pose to do... Right?
I know there was a time when we didn't get along, at all. (Umm...hello? Who remembers you calling me a bitch on my wedding day? Meeeee!!! =P)
During the past year, we have gotten so close (sometimes too close, haha!), and I'm so glad. I used to wonder what it would be like if Sadie had lived, and I'd have had an older sister...now I feel like I know. It's nice to have someone that I can connect with and talk to.
You have become one of my very best friends (and I never really thought I'd see the day I would say that.) and I love you.
I'm so glad you're my sister.
Looove,
Kimmie.
P.S. Sometimes, you get on my nerves, still...and I'm sure I get on yours, but that's what sisters are s'pose to do... Right?
Dear Kindle
Dear Kindle,
You might get me fired. I enjoy sneaking peaks at your books when I should be working.
Oops?
Looove,
Kimmie.
You might get me fired. I enjoy sneaking peaks at your books when I should be working.
Oops?
Looove,
Kimmie.
6.06.2011
P.S.
P.S.
I keep hearing what you said to me... RAWR! You are the kind of man I write stories about.
I keep hearing what you said to me... RAWR! You are the kind of man I write stories about.
6.05.2011
6.03.2011
Dear Man
Dear Man,
What was the point of telling me that story if you aren't going to explain what you meant by it. I thought I was following along quite nicely...untill you kept stressing that one thing...and...I just don't understand it's importance. Perhaps I'm dumb...
...but at least I knew what a flagpole truck was. So nyeh!
Looove,
Kimmie.
What was the point of telling me that story if you aren't going to explain what you meant by it. I thought I was following along quite nicely...untill you kept stressing that one thing...and...I just don't understand it's importance. Perhaps I'm dumb...
...but at least I knew what a flagpole truck was. So nyeh!
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear Man
Dear Man,
I'm not sure what to think exactly... I really feel like you can do better than... that.
It was interesting though...to see you interact with her. I saw you look at her the same way you used to look at me when you thought you were in trouble for something but you were trying to be nice to redeem yourself... What was that about? I have just as much right to be in the store as you do.
She was just not that impressive... this too shall pass... I hope. For your sake.
Looove,
Kimmie.
I'm not sure what to think exactly... I really feel like you can do better than... that.
It was interesting though...to see you interact with her. I saw you look at her the same way you used to look at me when you thought you were in trouble for something but you were trying to be nice to redeem yourself... What was that about? I have just as much right to be in the store as you do.
She was just not that impressive... this too shall pass... I hope. For your sake.
Looove,
Kimmie.
Dear 5PM
Dear 5PM,
I'm ready for you. I've been ready since Tuesday morning. I just want a nice relaxing weekend of reading and being nerdy. I wish I could have the house to myself...alas...I don't think that's gonna happen.
Anywhosywhatsit... Hurry up!
Looove,
Kimmie.
I'm ready for you. I've been ready since Tuesday morning. I just want a nice relaxing weekend of reading and being nerdy. I wish I could have the house to myself...alas...I don't think that's gonna happen.
Anywhosywhatsit... Hurry up!
Looove,
Kimmie.
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